Am I Ever Going to Change?

September 13, 2021  (Post #63)

(From Journal #9:  April 7, 2007)

As I was driving earlier today, I was listening to a teaching on the radio about “am I ever going to change?”  It was good for me to hear it because there are so many things in my life I need to change, but I cannot.  I need You to change me.  I just pulled over to the side of the road and prayed that today would be the day I turn everything over to you.  The preacher said it won’t happen overnight and not to be self-condemning during the process, but trust the Holy Spirit to convict, teach, and lead me to change and it will happen. 

Here are areas I can identify now.  Each one affects the others. I’m trusting You to show me every area in need of change.

Love Walk:  Help me to love others when they aren’t behaving the way “I” want them to.  I cannot control or change others; how could I when obviously I cannot change myself…?

1 Timothy 1:5 The goal of this command is love, which comes from a pure heart and a good conscience and a sincere faith.

Control My Tongue:   Too often I still let coarse language out of my mouth.  Too often I am critical of others and of myself.  Controlling my tongue has a direct affect on my love walk too.  

Proverbs 15: 1, 4:  A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. The tongue that brings healing is a tree of life… 

Proverbs 10:19:  When words are many, sin is not absent, but he who holds his tongue is wise.

Self Control:  I haven’t been able to lose some extra pounds I’ve gained or get into a regular exercise routine.  I usually set unrealistic goals too soon, and when I fail to meet them I get discouraged and give up.  I don’t like exercise, plain and simple.  Help me get to the place where I do enjoy it and am willing to do it.  There are disabled people who would give anything to be able to exercise.  Forgive me, Lord.

Galatians 5:16-17:  So I say, live by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature.  For the sinful nature desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the sinful nature. They are in conflict with each other, so that you do not do what you want.

Galatians 5:22-23:  But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. 

Productivity:  Too often I just can’t seem to get going and tackle things that need to get done, and then I get down on myself.  I want to be more focused and less distracted by wasteful things like TV, computer, etc. By becoming more focused and organized I’ll have more time for Kingdom purposes.

Proverbs 31:17,27:  She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks. She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness.

Sleep:  Help me identify the things that impede and interrupt sleep and give them to You.  I know I need more sleep and better sleep in order to be more productive. 

Proverbs 3:24:  When you lie down, you will not be afraid; when you lie down, your sleep will be sweet.

Psalm 4:8  In peace I will lie down and sleep, for you alone, Lord, make me dwell in safety.

Fear:  I know that fear isn’t from You.  I don’t want the enemy to have an opening to use fear against me in any area:  healing, financial stability, my family’s protection, painting — anything.  I want to give it all to You, and grow in faith and trust.

2 Timothy 1:7:  For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.

Proverbs 1:33:  …but whoever listens to me will live in safety and be at ease, and will be secure, without fear of harm.

5 responses to “Am I Ever Going to Change?”

  1. Where did you get this depth of insight? You never cease to amaze me. Thank you for sharing your wisdom.

    • Pearl says:

      Thank you. I wish I could say that by now all these areas are as they should be. But truthfully, I could just as easily have written this today. Thankfully God’s mercies are new every day and the Holy Spirit hasn’t given up on me.

  2. Robbi Jamieson Jonas says:

    I can relate to all of these. So thankful for His mercies!

  3. Scherry Kilness says:

    Oh, Margie! You hit all the nails right on the head! So relevant for today, even though written sometime ago. Love you!

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